Public Speaker
McMinnville's Finest
I started life as a lisper. My mom says it's because I sucked my thumb until I was seven and pushed all my front teeth out. Like all very special fourth grade girls I had to attend speech therapy in the "special" room of the school. I was also very shy. My own family didn't realize this because around them I was the mile-a-minute talker. How could such a child be shy? But I was. Reading passages from books out loud in class, as all kids were expected to do, was a special kind of torture. I would stutter, lisp, break out in a sweat, and blush madly every time I said a word wrong with all those hostile eyes fixed on me.
One of the reasons I knew I couldn't be a teacher as a profession, aside from the fact that young people often make me want to wring their necks, is that a job which calls for standing in front of thirty pairs of alien eyes every day would absolutely give me a stroke within the first year.
I've heard it suggested that no one likes public speaking but that can't be true because some people seek it out. I really think that stand up comedians are bizarre human beings- they not only stand in front of hundreds of people with a spot light on them but they do it with the intention of making people laugh. I'd rather die. Actors seem to thrive on this sort of attention. And then there are the professors who love to hear themselves talk...c'mon, you know what I'm talking about.
I have taught friends to make bread and to can food but with friends I am my dorky self. I can wander through parentheticals like paths in a beautiful garden and my friends never make fun of me or let me know if they're having mean thoughts. I am actually a very good teacher of the things I know when I can do it in my style.
Today Nicole and I are going to stand up in front of people and give them an introduction to food preserving, provided people come. Maybe no one will come? But we want people to come because both of us are passionate food preserving geeks who want to inspire other people to dive in and become more self sufficient. We want people to listen to us and leave thinking "I can totally make my own pickles!"
Nicole is also a shy person. We're quite a pair to be giving a talk. We're like Abbot and Costello.
I've been feeling a little rejected by my city lately. The only business that has really embraced me is the toy store for which I couldn't be more grateful*. It's actually quite fun working there and I don't worry before I come in. But I still have to find another part time job. I know so many people in my town. I have so many great connections. I care about my community here more than I've ever cared about other communities I've lived in. I have so much to offer my county but my county doesn't really have a place for me.
Except as a free public speaker, apparently.
Here's what I keep thinking: I am an excellent employee. I'm loyal, I have a strong work ethic, I am independent when independence is called for but am also an excellent team player. It's rare to find both qualities in one person. I don't have a lot of ego about my work- I don't need to get petted and coddled to perform well. My work ego is only concerned about providing what my employers and my coworkers need. I am a vibrant person and in spite of my private challenges what I bring to work with me is an overflowing positive energy, sunshine, an ability to stay calm under pressure, and a deep pleasure in bringing satisfaction to others through my work. I learn computer programs quickly, I have a ton of experience with customer service, office procedures, I'm organized, I'm an excellent multi tasker, I have an exquisite eye for detail without losing the big picture.
What employer wouldn't want those qualities?
What keeps coming to me is the possibility that my town doesn't value these things. My town hasn't come to a full realization how talented I am at learning new things and bringing sunshine with me everywhere even when it's pretty dark under my own skin. My town, perhaps, doesn't know how to use a person who is so flexible. Is it possible that the only way my talents will be recognized and used professionally is to get hired in someone else's community?
I keep thinking there is nowhere for me. I keep thinking that I made a giant mistake ten years ago when I left my swatching job to go back to school. Education is considered so important to so many people but even though I took two years of academic classes and got a 4.0 gpa, it counts for nothing since I didn't get a degree out of it. I made a detour to enrich myself and it seems that all I did was damn myself for all future employment. I should have stayed the course I was on.
And think on this, all of you who want to embark on your own business: owning your own business is like the kiss of death for future employment. Supposedly it will show off what a multi-talented person you are but all it really does is make you seem over qualified for most jobs. I've heard of this happening before I had my own business. Since I was my own administrative person you'd think that I would now be considered qualified for all administrative positions. And that's where you'd be wrong. It only counts if you've done it for someone else.
So today I am going to perform a public service for my community at great cost to my comfort; performing the one task that I have no talent for and dread above all others. That's all my community wants from me (right now) and I'm going to give it the best I can. That's how much I love where I live and the people who share this county with me. It's true love and I will forgive it for not recognizing everything I have and want to share with it.
*Safeway also embraced me and Diane and Sue couldn't have been nicer. With more on-the-till training I could have been Safeway material but Safeway's method of training wasn't enough for me. I learn very quickly by actually doing a job with a mentor at my side. Clearly I'm not talented enough for Safeway but I was grateful for the opportunity to give it a try.
One of the reasons I knew I couldn't be a teacher as a profession, aside from the fact that young people often make me want to wring their necks, is that a job which calls for standing in front of thirty pairs of alien eyes every day would absolutely give me a stroke within the first year.
I've heard it suggested that no one likes public speaking but that can't be true because some people seek it out. I really think that stand up comedians are bizarre human beings- they not only stand in front of hundreds of people with a spot light on them but they do it with the intention of making people laugh. I'd rather die. Actors seem to thrive on this sort of attention. And then there are the professors who love to hear themselves talk...c'mon, you know what I'm talking about.
I have taught friends to make bread and to can food but with friends I am my dorky self. I can wander through parentheticals like paths in a beautiful garden and my friends never make fun of me or let me know if they're having mean thoughts. I am actually a very good teacher of the things I know when I can do it in my style.
Today Nicole and I are going to stand up in front of people and give them an introduction to food preserving, provided people come. Maybe no one will come? But we want people to come because both of us are passionate food preserving geeks who want to inspire other people to dive in and become more self sufficient. We want people to listen to us and leave thinking "I can totally make my own pickles!"
Nicole is also a shy person. We're quite a pair to be giving a talk. We're like Abbot and Costello.
I've been feeling a little rejected by my city lately. The only business that has really embraced me is the toy store for which I couldn't be more grateful*. It's actually quite fun working there and I don't worry before I come in. But I still have to find another part time job. I know so many people in my town. I have so many great connections. I care about my community here more than I've ever cared about other communities I've lived in. I have so much to offer my county but my county doesn't really have a place for me.
Except as a free public speaker, apparently.
Here's what I keep thinking: I am an excellent employee. I'm loyal, I have a strong work ethic, I am independent when independence is called for but am also an excellent team player. It's rare to find both qualities in one person. I don't have a lot of ego about my work- I don't need to get petted and coddled to perform well. My work ego is only concerned about providing what my employers and my coworkers need. I am a vibrant person and in spite of my private challenges what I bring to work with me is an overflowing positive energy, sunshine, an ability to stay calm under pressure, and a deep pleasure in bringing satisfaction to others through my work. I learn computer programs quickly, I have a ton of experience with customer service, office procedures, I'm organized, I'm an excellent multi tasker, I have an exquisite eye for detail without losing the big picture.
What employer wouldn't want those qualities?
What keeps coming to me is the possibility that my town doesn't value these things. My town hasn't come to a full realization how talented I am at learning new things and bringing sunshine with me everywhere even when it's pretty dark under my own skin. My town, perhaps, doesn't know how to use a person who is so flexible. Is it possible that the only way my talents will be recognized and used professionally is to get hired in someone else's community?
I keep thinking there is nowhere for me. I keep thinking that I made a giant mistake ten years ago when I left my swatching job to go back to school. Education is considered so important to so many people but even though I took two years of academic classes and got a 4.0 gpa, it counts for nothing since I didn't get a degree out of it. I made a detour to enrich myself and it seems that all I did was damn myself for all future employment. I should have stayed the course I was on.
And think on this, all of you who want to embark on your own business: owning your own business is like the kiss of death for future employment. Supposedly it will show off what a multi-talented person you are but all it really does is make you seem over qualified for most jobs. I've heard of this happening before I had my own business. Since I was my own administrative person you'd think that I would now be considered qualified for all administrative positions. And that's where you'd be wrong. It only counts if you've done it for someone else.
So today I am going to perform a public service for my community at great cost to my comfort; performing the one task that I have no talent for and dread above all others. That's all my community wants from me (right now) and I'm going to give it the best I can. That's how much I love where I live and the people who share this county with me. It's true love and I will forgive it for not recognizing everything I have and want to share with it.
At least we'll always have Paris The Carnegie Room.
Kisses, McMinnville!!!!
Kisses, McMinnville!!!!
*Safeway also embraced me and Diane and Sue couldn't have been nicer. With more on-the-till training I could have been Safeway material but Safeway's method of training wasn't enough for me. I learn very quickly by actually doing a job with a mentor at my side. Clearly I'm not talented enough for Safeway but I was grateful for the opportunity to give it a try.
